Of Brains and Celery
by Pinky Lillix
Summary: mommaleasey and I were under the influence of...insanity...Just read it. Or I'll be, like... sad and stuff.


Well,** mommaleasey, **the alleged goddess of glue, and I have been exchanging some insane e-mails lately, and this is what came from them. So I decided to post it here. But before you read this,read **mommaleasey's** story "Mini Armada"! Tis hilarious! Also this has alot to do with this. . .

Words in **bold**are **mommaleasey's**, and the regular are mine, because I am just not cool enough for bold. Such is the story of my life.

Why do I always feel a need to explain everything?

* * *

**Zim: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I HAVE TRICKED YOU INTO REVIEWING FOR ME! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I RULE YOU HUMAN! For I am-ZIM! IN DISGIUSE ON THE INTERNET!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

Pinky: I am very upset that you tricked me, Zim. But now that I'm actually talking to you. . . what's it like being an Irken? Is it really a true statement that it's not easy being green, or has Kermit the frog been lying to us this whole time?

**Zim: KERMIT? What is this KERMIT you speak of human? **

**Con:Kermit is a retarded puppet with bad taste in woman. Miss Piggy is UGLY! Not like the wondrous TAK in the least. **

**Zim:Begone with you! I have had enough your snack related rock jokes! **

**Pinky:I haven't been eating rocks or snacks. **

**Zim:LIAR!**

Pinky: You dare call me a liar Zim!

Zim: THAT I DO!

Pinky:. . . (shrugs). . . okay. . . OMG! It's Con! HI CON! I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN!...I think. . . (waves arms around in frantic motion) (gets hit by a bus. . .that. . .drove through. . .my house. . .)

**Con:HOLY SHIT! A bus went THROUGH your FLIPPIN house! THROUGH YOUR HOUSE! **

**...Want an autograph? **

**Pinky:Yes. **

**Con:Gives autograph have a nice day! Kill any Irkens you see: ) **

**Zim:This is NONSENSE! Zim needs no IRKEN KIILING HUMAN! Zim needs...well, food actually. I'm huuuuuuuuuuungry! Pinky:Aww...Is the baby in your belly hungry? **

**Zim:NO! (insert blush emoticon here) And mommaleaseys smileys SUCK!**

Pinky: I have Con's autograph! This is the happiest day of my life! If only I wasn't paralyzed from the bus-incident, I would _soooo_ be dancing for joy! . . . Zim! Dance in my place!

Zim: NEVER! (le twitch)

Pinky: (stares him down) (pulls out remote control) (demonically) You _will_ dance for me! (pushes button as screechy horror music plays in the background) (remote control explodes) (so does Pinky)

Zim: HA! FOOLISH HUMAN! UNABLE TO CONTROL _ZIM- _(explodes)

(so does the rest of the world) (except Con)

Con:. . . dammit. . .

**Con: DAMMIT! I'm STILL ALIVE! wait..if Zim exploded...PINKY KILLED A SMEET! OMG! **

**Pinky:I am pinky's Zombie! RAWR! **

**Con: Are you gonna suck out my brain? **

**Pinky: NO! I seek a preview of the next chapter! **

**Con: Well, a cultist Snail is in it. He likes brains. Oh yeah...BRAINS! **

**Pinky:...what?**

Pinky: Wait. . . but _you're_ a brain, Con! (clings to him) Omg, you're gonna die!

Con:. . . if I had eyes, I would be crying tears of joy.

Pinky: Unless he only like the fleshy, squishy kind.

Con: . . . (explodes)

Pinky: OO Omg. . . he's dead. . .

_Dead Con: Finally!_

Zim:(popping out of no where) I'm back to life! And because this blasted _smeet_ is jumbling my usually cold, hard emotions into some strange sort of generous compassion, _Zim_ will bring anyone whoever exploded back to life, using THIS! (holds up a celery stalk over his head)

Pinky: But that's celery.

Zim: SILENCE! (devours celery)

(somehow, everyone comes back to life)

The world: Yay for Zim!

Con: DAMN YOU ZIM!

Zim: (sniffs) I changed my mind, I want you all dead. . . (runs in room, crying) (eats ice cream to soothe his pain) (pokes his stomach) I am _so_ fat. . . (sniffs)

**Pinky:Your not fat Zim! Just Preggy! Besides, if you think your fat, why would you eat Ice cream? And how did you bring the world back with celery? **

**Zim:DON'T CALL ME FAT HUMAN! snifs **

**Pinky:How did you sniff without a nose? **

**Con:HEY! The celery is back! and it wasn't celery! It was Tallest Red! **

**Red:Why am I here? **

**mommaleasey:Cause, Your hot. You were always my fetish! **

**Red:EW! I can't believe a stupid human thinks im hot. I mean it's cool, but your 14. I don't wanna be a pediphile! **

**Zim:IM GOING INTO LABOR! **

**Everyone else: GASP!**

Pinky: Omg Red, you _are_ pretty hot. . . but why were you disguised as celery?

Red: Whoever said anything about a disguise? (he's secretly celery. . . tis a secret)

Zim: I SAID _I'M GOING IN TO LABOR!_

Red and Pinky: . . . oh. . .yeah. . . right. . . OMG LABOR!

mommaleasey: Le gasp! Okay Zim. . . deep breaths okay. . . ?

Zim: (is in labor pain) (sad, sad)

Con: (cackles at Zim's expense)

mommaleasey: (throws shoe at him) Silence! (le spaz) Zim. . . you okay. . .?

Zim: (strained) You. . . you did this to me!

Pinky, Red and Con: mommaleasey's the daddy!

**Red: Cut him open! **

**mommaleasey: I will! cut's Zim open HEY THERES JUST A CENCOR BAR HERE! **

**pinky: You can't show the baby. It will be born in ch. 6 of Mini Armada. **

**you didn't want to spoil it. **

**mommaleasey: Yeah...I'm gonna make out with Red! **

**Red: YAY! **

**END**

It's over. Go away.

NO WAIT! COME BACK! I . . .I LOVE YOU!

No wait, I changed my mind. . .

I don't. But review anyway!


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